That’s Your Problem

Yet, another fight with hurtful, flung words
Escalating volume and bulging eyes
Red faces, slamming doors, and stalking off down the stairs
With angry tones and nasties still following both of us

What brings us each to these places?
What other options do I have?
What other options does my other have?
What do we do when it is all over?

Inner exploration is the only sure thing that works for me 
What triggers me again and again, needs my setting down
My not feeling heard or understood, needs my clearing
My words not seemingly received as valuable, needs my attention

As anger escalates and stays at a heightened, hidden level
The biggest temptation is to bury the issues and the experience
Tiptoe around them and both pretend we do not have
An enormous pink elephant in the room

Pretty soon we are skilled at not addressing anger
We get to a place of lackluster and self-protection
We choose immediate placating and ignoring
Hoping it will all blow over and somehow just disappear

However, when the same issues come up again
The energy is fueled from all the previous times
We have stalked off and pretended we made up
Put on a good face without doing the inner clean up

God of all, help me see what is not at peace within
Help me honor what is not at peace for my other
Help me be brave enough to try again when calmer
Help me be open to what is hurting for my other

I call forth love and kindness for us both
Compassion for my other and for myself
Joy that we are together through thick and thin
Inclusive energy where I don’t get to say, That’s your problem.


Created with a big nod to Thich Nhat Hanh