Robbins Hopkins

Spiritual Health: Being at Peace in Everyday Life

blame

Anger Dispelled

I stumbled into Silence dragging my anger behind
Urgently seeking something I could not describe
I was a cheerful, happy person on the outside
An angry, blaming, and furious one on the inside

Photo by Mehrdad Haghighi

I did not intend to be angry with myself and others
It just came boiling forth when I least expected it
For the life of me, I could not stop it
It was as if a switch turned on and another person took over

Then came the shame, the apologies, the determination to do better
I blamed my constant back pain, my work demands
I blamed my upbringing, my family, and my friends
I blamed myself most of all as I again vowed to stem the anger

Who would choose to live with a person like me?
A kettle poised to boil over any time, day or night
My insides tightly coiled while balancing everything
With the profound determination to do it all, perfectly

I staggered into Silence to test the waters
I sought something that seemed elusive and undefined
I had no idea what lay crawling and writhing beneath my surface
Anger just simmered slowly, waiting for the ignition of the flames

When the burn came roaring in, as it always did
I was fabulous at this expression of rage and power
I was a masterful example of a woman scorned
I was always right in this one-sided state of explosion

It took me years to walk away when I exploded
It took me hours in Silence to remember I was loved
It took profoundly deep tears to forgive my behavior
It took countless hours naming all the fear fueling my rage

I would not have survived without finding Silence
Somehow in Sacred Space, I could not hide
I could not use excuses, I had to face my demons
I had to see the poison I was creating through my anger

Photo by Kings Cichewicz

So I wrote from my deep heart, cried, and tried again
I sought deliverance from myself and I felt my heart sigh
I was filled with an uncanny vibrational presence
That felt like God’s love to me, even as I questioned it

As I painfully acknowledged all my anger and attack energy
I began to realize that somehow, miraculously,  I was still loved
My behavior was not me, it was something I could address
I even felt the thrill of Divine Presence within when I spoke the truth

I finally got that I  just needed to stay on the path
To wholeness, to truth, to continue seeking peace
All else was given, continuously, again and again
My job was to work through every last morsel of anger

I spent hundreds of hours writing out my woe
Dear God was always my intro, designed to keep me honest
All the accusing, writhing, self-denunciating,  despicable me
Laid out scrupulously revealed as an offering to Divine Source

We finally finished our journey of anger and rage
I began to have months and then years with no outbursts
I began to think I was done with the inner seeking, the shame
Then we began anew to work on judgment, again and again

Wish me luck and stamina
I know we will slay this dragon someday
I know I am not alone as long as I show up
As long as I keep myself in a humble place of trying
All is good and I will be truly whole!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Confronting Rage

Rage is unbridled anger spewing out. It is usually aimed at someone or something and we call it rage because we have no control over when it erupts or who it hurts. It is worth addressing directly!

Photo by Gabriel Matula

Where can you start if you have raging reactions with yourself or with individuals? The good news is that it is possible to clear your own energy field of the underlying issues manifesting as rage. Begin by listing the issues that trigger your anger and rage. What situations get you into your state of rage? There are reasons for rage, but if they have not been addressed for years and years, these reasons may simply feel like part of “who you are”. Rage in not a personality trait. Rage is a response to deeply hurtful issues which have not fully healed. Only you have a sense of what triggers your anger and fans the flames into rage.

Rage is tricky when power issues are also involved such as with blowing up with your children, with a spouse who makes less money than you, or with an employee who works for you. Saying you are sorry for your anger or rage response is a necessary first step but it is also insufficient. Stopping the behavior is the only completely acceptable way out of anger and rage. These are some of the triggers for anger or rage.

  • Negative judgment of others’ behaviors
  • Feeling overwhelmed by the implications for you when another person “slacks” off
  • Feeling disrespected and/or belittled
  • Feeling disempowered to bring about any change
  • Feeling challenged by another’s words or behaviors
  • Wanting things to go the way you want them to go regardless of other viewpoints
  • Feeling unheard and unimportant
  • Carrying old unhealed feelings about anger and rage experiences in the past
  • Choosing rage in order to remain dominant in a relationship
Photo by Nick Nice

Any of these triggers can cause anger and rage, or not. The issue is whether you can heal the feelings you have that cause the explosive responses. Healing your rage really has nothing to do with the situation or the other person(s) involved. The rage is coming from within you and has to be healed from within you.  As Einstein has noted, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

These incidents of rage have to be healed from a higher level of consciousness. The Six-Step Spiritual Healing Protocol leads you through a process of clearing. When working in Sacred Space and in partnership with Divine Beings, you have a real opportunity to succeed in clearing rage from your energy field.

Quick Overview of Steps

  1. Open Sacred Space
  2. Make a list of the feelings you felt when you reacted with anger that grew into rage
  3. Name the trauma energies you carry which fueled the rage
  4. Call for the clearing of the trauma energies you felt
  5. Give thanks

Example Case

Brad frequently yelled with rage at Tim, his son, when he was “goofing” off and not doing what Brad thought he was supposed to be doing. Brad called him lazy, self-involved, a total waste of a person, and not even worth his time, among other things. He also lambasted Tim regularly for being a slob. This caused anger responses from Tim, frequently strained interactions between Brad and his son, and more and more distance between them.

Brad identified the following trauma energies he was carrying which caused him rage at Tim.

  • Rage, anger, and blame with Tim trauma energy and all symptoms
  • Fear that Tim was going to fail his classes trauma energy and all symptoms
  • Fear that his son would always be a failure trauma energy and all symptoms
  • Fear that his son had no good motivations trauma energy and all symptoms
  • Anger at Tim for squandering his opportunities (that Brad was working hard to offer him) trauma energy and all symptoms
  • Anger at his own Dad (for browbeating him all through high school) trauma energy
  • Resentment that his current boss blasted him regularly (for any small oversight) trauma energy

All these trauma energies were cleared from Brad’s field by using the Six-Step Spiritual Healing Protocol and new ways of working with Tim slowly came into their lives. He returned often to clear for other triggers he realized he was carrying which was helping in all the places anger and rage had been showing up.

Look at your rage and anger!  Figure out what is behind the strong emotions you feel. Ask for Help in Sacred Space and clear for all the trauma energy you can name that might be fueling your rage. More peace, balance, and health awaits you.  Your body, your energy field, your family, friends, and colleagues will all benefit from your doing this inner work!