Blog

Jun 21 2021

44 Years Together and Still Loving

It is indeed an amazing miracle
To have a sister manifest in one’s life
Especially when we did not grow up together
Marriage to her brother, brought my sister into my life

Now we are in our 44th year of living together
Raising our children in the same house
Learning how to interact lovingly together
Becoming familiar with each other’s likes and concerns

We came with very different personalities
She being the introvert and I being the extrovert
We have learned to traverse our differences
To look for the shared goodness and values

We share a joyful love for flowers
Making and eating gingerbread with lemon sauce
Negotiating extended days for family gatherings
And unexpected tears to acts of kindness

We might have never found each other casually
Though we have become trusted family over the years
While living life together in community
She does not seem 80 and yet that is where we are

She is thoughtful, creative, reflective, determined, kind
What an amazing life we have lived together
I like to think we have learned from each other
Most importantly, we learned to work things out

She loves and cares about our family as I do theirs
All together we are family having lived and loved together
Talking, relying, negotiating, appreciating and feeling blessed
Though truly I never thought I’d have a sister and yet, here she is

Apr 08 2021

Ode To A Tiny Human

What a bundle of joy arrived for us
He has tiny hands and tiny feet
He sleeps and sleeps and eat and eats
And spreads joy just by his presence

In between times, he wrinkles and yawns
Stretches and kicks, reaches and grabs
Adjusting, exploring this place where he has landed
With these new people he is getting to know

He is a perfect wee miniature of us
And yet, a daily amazing reminder
Of the Creator energy among us
Of the extraordinary miracle of Life

We have all changed profoundly
With his timely arrival into our lives
We coo and rock, gesture and cuddle
We have found our gentle hearts refreshed

We are charmed by his very presence
We are reminded to be our best selves
We are insistently needed to care for another
While each being blessed in perfect ways

He is an ever present reminder
That all of life is Sacred
That we can’t begin to fully grasp
The power of Divine Source

We are all called to help raise the children
They are so little and without knowing
We are the ones to bring the Light
To every little one among us

A Sacred tiny being with so much power
He brings the goodness and miracle of birth
Uprooting all of us as he inserts himself
Right into the middle of our lives

Reminding us that we too are powerfully loved
That patience with self and others is ever needed
That gentleness is always rewarded
That kindness is miracle energy worth cultivating for us all

Feb 11 2021

Helplessness

Helplessness comes from repeated cultural conditioning
From accepting the limitations of the seen world

Your perceptions of the possible are limited
By surroundings, thoughts, experiences, and your humanness

What you have not experienced, you do not imagine can be
What you are afraid will happen to you, overrides the possible

Your mind is strongly responsive to what has been
You must escape the mind to imagine the Infinite

The mind deals wonderfully with what can be seen
The heart deals wonderfully with all that is unseen

Dreaming with conviction of what could be is freeing
Imagining wholeness is a step to manifesting wholeness

However you need to begin by thoroughly slaying the constrictions
The mind holds as inevitable and its misperceptions of what is

To go beyond helplessness, you must command it out
You must create a clean slate for creating your heart’s desire

All then is possible even that which was impossible the minute before
All can then work together with Divine Source to manifest your wholeness

Feb 03 2021

Hope and Rigor

When I sit alone, having been alone now for many months
I realize Peace is my companion
That was not the case for much of this lifetime
I was fastly tethered to my emotions and commitments

Thousands of hours of seeking and meditating later
I know that hope and rigor have been my true companions
When deeply sad, angry, frustrated or out of sorts
I learned in Silence to search out hope

Hope was a little spark among the heaviness
It grew out of making my mind go to gratitude
It grew out of the determination to clear the darkness
Again and again, I learned that facing the dark feelings worked

I tried for years to ignore all problems, fastidiously
I could make myself really believe I was not angry or sad
Especially when I was most indeed angry or sad
Or when I thought that ignoring my feelings could work

Usually I exploded with some unkind response to my family
Before I began to realize that I thought I was being good
By ignoring the heavy emotions that accompanied my life
But I was really just letting them fester until they burst forth

Ugh! So much nastiness got sprayed on those around me
Before I realized I could take the hard stuff into Silence
That I could bring my feelings to that eternal table
That I would actually be heard and my feelings could transform

First I had to wrestle with having the right to ask for help
Then I had to work on being worthy of being heard and responded to
Then I had to learn to trust that the healing coming in would be enough
Then I learned to be grateful for something I never ever thought could happen

Jan 13 2021

Bloom Again

Where is my strength and stamina?
Where do I find my way back to normalcy?
I feel lost and depleted in these endless dark days
Where death, hatred, and violence dwell side by side

I could never have imagined such loss and sorrow
I could never have written this script we are living
What does it all mean, really?
Have we uncovered the hornet’s nest and it is life?

I remember days of laughter and exploration
I long for a dinner in a lovely restaurant
Celebrating anything really, celebrating goodness
Celebrating joy, life, free time, and loved ones

I find that I am bereft, without hugs, without seeing smiles
I go about my days wondering if we will ever emerge
From the scourge of the virus, deaths, and denials
If we will ever find our way back to wholeness for all

We are so into darkness that the Light seems dimmed
The hatred among us keeps erupting into violence
The desire for dominion over all looms as a boon
Then transforms into gnarled, twisted anger and rage

I fall on my knees and deeply seek Divine deliverance
We have gone beyond the ability to heal ourselves individually
We profoundly need Divine Presence among us, now
We need clear lights, clear minds and loving hearts

We need solace, kindness and the strength to hope
We call for a way out of the viciousness and corruption of power
We call forth a new path for every person who has ears to hear
We call for the past to heal deeply enough for the bulbs to bloom again