What is shame but the result
Of taught expectations and rules
Delivered by a hurting person
Disconnected from Divine Source?
I was taught embarrassment for who I am
I was expected to hide my mistakes
I received ruthless judgment of me as lacking
I learned to blame and question my own worth
Persistent messages revealed my constant failure
Ingrained feelings grew into mistrust and self-hate
Endless messages of indignity and mortification
What if I am truly to blame for the faults I have?
How do all those early lessons in shame
Get reframed with love and acceptance?
Where is enough love to heal this pain?
How does trust in self-goodness even blossom?
Still though, how do I measure up to something so firm
So unbending, and starkly delivered?
Maybe I am not here to love myself fully
I have learned how to self-protect my every choice
I also learned to aim for perfection in all things
Though I always expect swift scorn and failure
Ruthless judging has been ever present
I even use ridicule and anger towards myself now
In the quiet though, my spirit still yearns to soar
I long to feel unencumbered and free
My heart seeks true love and kindness
I know my being needs to be safe, somewhere
Who will walk with me on this journey?
Who will reinforce my search for self-love?
Who will be my go to when I do fail?
Who will hold my heart as I try again?
There is talk of a place of wholeness, within
I have heard that phrase, though I do not know it
I intend to find my way out of this shame
And I will never create this darkness for another
Thank you Robbins, for this reflection. I know some of these sentiments all too well (eg Where is enough love to heal this pain?) You’ve captured so much in your beautiful writing, also that last paragraph. I see you. xx
Thank you Amit. I have written this to honor all those who have lived with shame and are seeking to move past it. It can be an arduous process. I am so pleased you saw this and let me know. Blessings on your journey!! Namaste, Robbins