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Spiritual Health: Being at Peace in Everyday Life

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faith

Oct 18 2009

One day in India

My time in India was a time of sharp contrasts and self-reflection.   I have not been surrounded by that level of ever present poverty with the exception of working in the Yucatan in the late 1960s, since I was in India three years ago.

Women in color by Robbins Hopkins
Women in color by Robbins Hopkins

The contrasts of the grinding poverty and the brilliant saris in the middle of the street seemed strange.  Isn’t poverty’s color grey or somber?  Everywhere one looks in the towns is rubble, dirt, rocks, thatch huts, make-shift housing that is not make-shift, beggars, and need.  Yet the street markets are filled with flowers, fruits, and vegetables of every rainbow color. The living things of color dot the context of  greyness like determined hope.

Preparing our meal by Liz Spiwack
Preparing our meal by Liz Spiwack

In the middle of all of this, a family serves 14 of us,  the guests, a hot lunch everyday we are in their home and invites us to bask in their cheerfulness and love.

One can see the need in the faces of the street children, their outstretched hands immediately present when we stop. More need is etched in the wrinkles of the aged women who live on the streets.

One feels the overwhelming press of people, everywhere.  When looking at the sidewalks, they are usually 4 deep with people, all the time.

Townspeople viewing an accident by Liz Spiwack
Townspeople viewing an accident by Liz Spiwack

The roads are pressed with people, all the time.  There are those permanently connected to the ground through affliction and physical impairment, at every turn.

One has to release all sense of normalcy as we move through the throngs of people, motorcycles, auto-rickshaws, bikes, cars and trucks.  All is up to God, in every single way.  My sense of order, fabric of the society and the way one makes sense out of the world does not work in India as She has her own rhythm and vibration, completely apart from what is familiar to those of us visiting.  All the assumptions we hold do not work there.  There is another order of society which is not visible to us, however hard we try to see it.  I am constantly reminded that I am a visitor, in all ways.

The best we can do is to get a driver we can speak with who can be our go-between.  The best we can do is to eat all things cooked which are put before us and to eat nothing raw.  The best we an do is to be respectful of the religions ceremonies we are invited to attend and release all thoughts of what we are doing in India.  It is not clear why one is necessarily called to India,  it just simply happens.

Nothing is familiar, but a shared love of the Divine arrived at from vastly different paths, yet shared all the same. That is the amazing walk in India.

Puja ceremony by Liz Spiwack
Puja ceremony by Liz Spiwack

Amidst an endless background of poverty, one experiences the holy shrines, the elaborate religious festivals, the chanting of devotionals, the taking of prasada, blessed holy food, the use of the vibuti, the gift of amrita and cum-cum.  All the outwards ways of worshiping, are unfamiliar but the sharing of the Energy of Divine Presence is completely familiar.

It is as if all the signals for living are completely switched around and one has to make one’s way on faith that all will be fine.  Every moment of every day, one has to walk in faith that all will be fine.  Simply the process of putting on a sari in and of itself is daunting.

Robbins dressed for the puja by Liz Spiwack
Robbins dressed for the puja by Liz Spiwack

How does one put on 8 yards of material and move through the day?  All the conflicting energy around one’s public self and one’s private self gets a good shake-up.  Who are we really at the end of the day?  What is it that makes for order and “ordinary” time.  Certainly, not anything that shows on the outside.  That is all jumbled up because of the clothing we are wearing and the process of walking barefoot through all the shrines and homes, and the process of chanting and praying in Sanskrit, or Hindi, or English.  Can we really connect when we are this far out of our comfort zone?

I am so relieved again to find that my time in Silence is a constant.  It is a constant I can find again, there,  with all those people who are so different from me.  It is a constant that sees me through, even in the strangeness of the clothing I am wearing, the sounds I am hearing, the visions I am seeing, the smells I am smelling.  The Silence is my welcoming friend of deep solace.  It is my refuge that somehow reassures me that I am fine, that I am whole, that I am in that place for something I can’t understand with my mind, only with my heart.  Silence leads me to the space of deep connectedness with All That Is, including the very strange surroundings and customs I find myself partaking in.

Am I being true to myself?  What does all that even really mean, while being in India?  Do my outside actions really reflect who I am.  Probably not, as I feel off-kilter much of the time I am there.  I welcome smiles and kind words of those helping us through all of this.  I welcome the room given to us to rest where there is an air conditioner, a western toilet and places to leave our things.

Sari Lesson from Ribini for Robbins by Liz Spiwack
Sari Lesson from Ribini for Robbins by Liz Spiwack

I am touched by the helpful hands of young woman who teaches me to wrap the sari more securely.  I welcome the intimate stories of the woman in conjunction with her husband and family, who has overseen the expansion of support for 25 rural schools in south India, the creation of an orphanage, a medical clinic and an aging folks home.  All this in the midst of overwhelming physical poverty.

Alter within a home by Liz Spiwack
Alter within a home by Liz Spiwack

In their home, there are two large shrines to All That Is, known to them and many others, as Sai Baba.  There are all sorts of stories of the pictures and statues spontaneously producing vibuti, sacred ash, which has to be scooped up regularly. There is another reality they are living with, which I thankfully know in Silence, Love and Blessing.  We connect even though we are worlds apart, we are One.  That is beyond all that I could ever imagine, really way beyond anything my mind could have thought of.  That is why I have been called to India.  We are really All One, even though we may only have a glimpse of it one day in India.

My thanks to Liz Spiwack, one of my traveling companions, for the sharing of these photos from our trip for use in this post.

Written by · Categorized: General · Tagged: faith, one power, silence, source, trust

Mar 24 2009

Knowing God

Doves by audreyjm529

There is a dove cooing on the railing outside my window and a squirrel running down the hickory tree.  I saw a hawk in the tall oak out back feeding babies.   I see the pansies I planted yesterday, swaying in the chilly air.  The forsythia and the dew drops are out along with the crocus and vinca flowers.  Yesterday we saw a Bradford pear tree in full white bloom in the city, along with smaller pink and white flowering trees as well.  The miracle of spring never ceases to amaze me.

For the longest time, when I was unsettled, I would take a walk in nature.  I found the beauty calming and reassuring.  I still do.  At that time, it was one of the few activities I could count on that would connect me to the Greater Whole.  I still find that the coming of the dawn and the passing of seasons is the Earth’s way of speaking to me about the Great Oneness.  It is something that I know I don’t control, and it is  something that comes repeatedly, every day and and every year without fail.  It is something I can count on, completely.

Who does this?  What is the origin of the cycles of the seasons, of the moon and of the passages from night to day? Is there any among us capable of creating such a canvas?  I think not.  This experience in life is perhaps the most important communication to us about the Presence of a Greater Whole.  It is clearly larger than me, definitely more organized and ordered than me and yet it is still fully accessible to me just beyond my walls.  I have to pass beyond my walls of emotion, separateness and busyness to access all that is around me.

photo by schmidjon

I credit nature with kindling my faith in God before I knew anything at all about God, myself. I have blessedly always been surrounded by nature.  I had parents who would take us walking in the winter when the rattlers were hibernating just for Sunday afternoon romps in the woods.  We also spent hot summer nights camping out and vacations soaking in the beach’s sun, sand and sea.  When I was thirteen we hiked part of the Matterhorn with my five year old brother and Dad had to carry him half way back to the village where we were staying.  Being in nature equated with relaxing, being off and having an adventure.

These cues, all around,  helped me have faith that there was a God.  Even when my mind was trying out positions, rebuttals and researched evidence as to the non-existent God, nature was working it’s magic on me.  The coming of spring year after year, the birth of dogs, birds, deer, and horses, not to mention the breathtaking beauty of tulips, snapdragons, pansies and gladiolas,  all continued to hold the place for a God in my heart.  My mind essentially lost out in the overwhelming evidence of miraculous change, ordered by an unknown Source.  I came to know about this miracle of Source more powerfully than I could ever imagine when I  gave birth to two wee sons.  These experiences are hard to ignore.  They call to our inner knowing even if we are not listening yet with our hearts.  They keep calling to us, until we are ready to take another look at the Presence of the Greater Whole.

When I think of faith, I think of something that is hard to describe.  Faith seems to be a feeling that something will be further revealed if I can simply wait, keep learning, keep listening and roll with the ambiguity.  Faith is something that I feel each person defines differently.  For me, faith has been a place holder. Faith has held the place in my life for the possibility of God until I could have my own knowing experiences of God, myself.

I did not find a well defined pathway to a personal knowing of God.  Although, I tried a number of those supposedly “God-inspired” pathways,  such as church camp, Sunday school, catechism, youth group, volunteering with Mayas in Mexico, singing in a church choir, working in a hospital,  and holding office in a church.  My faith  still seemed undeveloped, wobbly, unclear, and certainly nothing to count on in tough times.  I used to wonder how people developed such powerful faith in Divine Energy.  How did that actually happen for someone?  I personally did not see a connection between organized religion and knowing God.  Primarily, I kept seeing all kinds of anger, judgment, prejudice, racism, sexism, injustice and war as the actions of those identifying themselves as religious or “God-fearing” persons.  This did not seem promising fodder for growing faith or for knowing God.

Immersed by premasagar

If I had not had 19 years of chronic back pain, I might have missed knowing God.  I had so much physical pain in my twenties and thirties that I simply was forced to look for something beyond the doctors and the body workers.  I began to devour everything I could find on spiritual healing, metaphysical experiences and new age spiritual journeys.   One day when studying with Rev. Ron Roth,  he said, ” you will never know God unless you meditate.  Go into Silence and begin.  There is no other way.” This made a huge impression on me.  I began by trying to sit by a tree everyday, in all weather to see if I could feel the power of God through that tree.  In time, I began to feel something moving in me.  I transferred this to my infinitely more comfortable bed and began a two year odyssey of spiritual healing and meditation which eventually resulted in both my coming to know God and the healing of my physical body.

There is no other way to know God except through the Silence.  We can know about God, we can love other people’s images and teachings about God, we can even speak and teach about God.  However, regardless of how much we may  speak with God or teach about God, that is not the same as knowing God ourselves.  God is formless and it is impossible to have a personal relationship with formless energy except in the Silence where all is formless. All else is an approximation of that knowing, it cannot be knowing unless we enter into Silence.   The still small voice is always there, accessible to all and magnificent.  Then faith becomes a knowing and knowing becomes the fuel of our lives.

Written by · Categorized: General · Tagged: faith, god, nature

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